Skylar Stephan. Photo/ Shaela Dansereau
Skylar Stephan, 22, says, “I vividly remember my grade eight high school dance and nobody wanted to dance with me.”
She remembers going home that night heartbroken and telling herself that she never wanted to feel that way again. And so it made her stronger.
Stephan recognizes that growing up, she was trying to conform to her friends’ style, and as a result wasn’t dressing right for her body. It wasn’t until years later when she began working at Addition Elle, that Stephan learned the real difference the right clothes could make.
When Stephan first stated working at Addition Elle, she was worried about being relatable to her customer. That nervousness quickly faded away however, when she learned how empowering it is making other women feel beautiful.
As a girl, there weren’t many plus sized, stylish clothing stores that were available. Many women also find them in denial of needing to size up. But Stephan states, there is no shame in shopping plus size to suit your body at the moment.
Because “you just have to roll with what you have,” Stephan says, “at the end of the day you have to take care of yourself. ”
Working at Addition Elle, Stephan found the style right for her and it helped her gain confidence in her body. She remembers one time when she “put on a dress and it felt so good,” and in that moment she appreciated her body and her own beauty.
Her perspective on the fashion industry has shifted as well. In the past she recalls fashion and beauty brands were very celebrity-centric. Such as having celebrities such as Katy Perry as a Covergirl, in her thin and beautiful glory. But now, she notices more modern bodies gracing the magazines and catwalks. Women, like plus size model Ashley Graham she notes.
Beauty ads that promote body positivity and inner beauty have also become more prominent in mainstream media. Campaigns such as Dove’s “love your body” campaign, really strike a cord with Stephan.
She says, “women are powerful when they are together.” Stephan notes how empowering it is to see women of every colour, shape, size and age come together and support one another. Not only that, but they all look beautiful, and are sending a positive message to women of every age about what it means to love our body.
Stephan acknowledges that if campaigns such as Dove’s had been around when she was growing up, she might have come to accept her body sooner and be confident in exactly who she is at an earlier age.
Stephan dresses herself in positivity in the morning.
The first thing she does after getting out of bed, is look herself in the mirror, and says something that she likes about herself. She has decided to put a shield up against any negative comments that might come her way and love herself and her body.
She says “I wake up everyday feeling good, and don’t let the negative comments get to me.”
She notes that she “shops where I am happiest.” Which is a major problem she believes many women are facing at the moment. Either people are not dressing to make themselves feel good or the options are not available to them. For example, she noticed that although Addition Elle had an extensive bra size selection, the aesthetics of the bras were limited. Unlike other lingerie retailers such as La Senza and Victoria’s Secret, larger sized bras not carried in those retailers do not have the luxury of extensive aesthetics. Women who do not have the option to shop at these stores would love to have a wide variety of bras with jewels, lace, patterns, stroppy backs, etc.
Stephan says that if a retailer such as Victoria’s Secret were to add sizes to the store they could go down in history, even more so than they are now.
Though she finds this to be a massive issue, she states that the biggest issue women face today about body image is negativity. Stephan believes “everyone should be nicer to themselves.” Her advice? Think positive. She believes in a few simple things when it comes to confidence and loving your body:
- Even if you only take two seconds of time, notice something positive about yourself.
- The world is big and there are so many body types out there, don’t compare yourself to your small circle or people in your community.
- Compliment people more, because “it makes them feel beautiful”, and in turn you will feel good too.
- Spice it up: change up your appearance every once in a while, whether it is experimenting with new makeup or changing the way you wear your hair, it’s amazing how great you feel when you try something new and love it.
- Try on everything, it’s the only way to truly know what will suit you best and in turn, make you feel like your most beautiful self.
Her mantra is confidence. “Working at Addition Elle is the best thing I ever did,” Stephan says. Her experience there has helped her gain confidence and promote it to other women in her life. She plans to use her persuasive selling skills and this confidence in her future as a realtor.
Through her life, Stephan has struggled with her confidence and body image, but she states that she now knows it made her stronger- because she had to fight to love herself, she knows the difference it makes in your life once you truly find confidence and self love.
Stephan hopes that one day as women we can learn to love ourselves and be confident, but above all else be positive and share that positivity with the people in our lives.